The musings of a juggling mother

Rants & raves about life as a woman today, juggling work, home, kids, family, life the universe & everything.

© Mrs Aginoth. The right of Mrs Aginoth to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted in accordance with sections 77 and 78 of the Copyright, Designs and Patents act 1988

Thursday, September 15, 2005

My problem kids

I so need some chocolate. It's been a long day, and there's more to go yet.

I've been at work again today. A quick trip down to Callington in Cornwall to meet with the sports college people there. They are great, and really help me look like I'm doing a wonderful job. Well, actually I do a wonderful job, mostly because I'd been doing the same job at much higher levels for years before dropping out of the career thing & looking after kids for a few years. So when this job came up, I found it simplicity itself to do the expected work, and have time to do a bit extra and to "bunk off" whenever the kids need me:-) Still, it's nice to have partners who work really hard & who are on the same track as me too.

However, it was a bit fraught as I had to squeeze it around the school day, and it's a 2 hour drive each way, plus a two hour meeting, so I only just made it. LMD made nanny's life hell after 30 mins or so, as thats about as long as she'll play without being able to see me! LMB was pretty horrible to leave as she refused food from anyone else, but at least she only cried when she got hungry, LMD cries on principle as soon as she realises I've gone, and wow can she get angry!

After school I took Mstr A to his swimming lesson. This is always embarrassing as Mstr A does not do social interaction, so he can not work within a group. One to one he is perfectly able to execute a number of difficult things, but put him in a group situation and he just wanders off & does his own thing, or worse, fights with all the others in the group. Today was a mixture of the two, and I left wondering if it's worth persevering with group lessons.

This behaviour has been becomming increasingly worse over the last year or so, and we have finally come to the conclusion, in discussion with his school, that it is not normal. So now I am starting on the long, slow and frustrating process of trying to find out exactly what is not normal, and if there is anything that can be done. However, his first appointment with the dr isn't till Wednesday, so for now, and probably for some years to come, we just have to try to manage his behaviour as best as possible.

I've also promised to get back to taking LMB swimming on Fridays, as she adores the water, and swimming is a vital skill for all children to learn - especially if like mine they live near the sea, a few lakes & plenty of rivers. Unfortunately I'm tutoring a course in Somerset in the evening, so I'm going to have to spend tonight writing lesson plans & most of tommorrow sorting out equipment as well as going swimming & looking after the girls.

LMD is still awake, active and demanding, despite it being past her bedtime, as she slept in the car to & from Callington, so my short relaxing time is being eroded as we speak.

When I first told her I was pregnant, my mother told me that being a mother means going to bed feeling guilty every night. At the time I thought she was being melodramatic, but now I know better.


  • At Thursday, September 15, 2005 9:00:00 pm, Blogger craziequeen said…

    The 'experts' told my brother his son had Attention deficit-hyperactivity disorder (ADD or ADHD) as he couldn't concentrate or interact with others...but he was amazingly clever.

    I always claimed my sweet temperamental nephew was a genius in waiting....

    He's just got all A*'s in his A levels and wants to be a doctor...

    Sometimes children are just difficult...but it's worth getting Mstr A checked out for any physical causes.


  • At Thursday, September 15, 2005 9:11:00 pm, Blogger Juggling Mother said…

    Its not ADHD - I've seen lots of children with that (dr's specifically send them to sports sessions) and although he exhibits many of the same behavious he sleeps 12 hours a night, and can happily concentrate for hours on a task, as long as he is alone.

    It's definitely a social problem. I reckon some kind of autism (though non of the currently particularly popular ones - I've done a few tests). He is bright, but is no longer showing it in class unless removed to a one-to-one situation.

    My baby brother was sociapathic - unable to understand the mores of society - an absolute nightmare to live with, but it is possible to teach them how to behave in a given situation, even if they don't understand why.

    I'm hoping we can find out what the problem with mstr A is early enough to give him a chance to re-integrate with his peers.

  • At Friday, September 16, 2005 7:51:00 pm, Blogger Mary P. said…

    Have you taken him to a specialist to have him tested?

  • At Friday, September 16, 2005 9:32:00 pm, Blogger Juggling Mother said…

    Got to start with our GP - that how the good ol' NHS works. We see the GP on Weds, & he decides who/where to refer us to, & how urgent it is, so we've got to be convincing!

    Still I'm not putting down the NHS. Mr A would cost over £100k pa anywhere else I think.

  • At Monday, September 19, 2005 9:59:00 pm, Blogger Mary P. said…

    Our system works much the same way, and, like you, I'm not about to put it down.

    (Not everything is covered, but a lot! Visits to your doctor are covered; to the optometrist every year for a child under 19, every other year for adults, but you buy your own glasses; a ward room in a hospital is covered; dentists, strangely, are not. Nor are prescriptions, though if the total annual amount is very large, you'll get a reduction on your taxes. Etc., etc.)

    The more I talk with my American readers, the more grateful I am for our Canadian health coverage. It seems like nothing is covered down there - it's absolutely appalling to think of a family being bankrupted trying to provide the care necessary to save a child's life, but it happens.

    The theory, of course, is that because they are taxed at such a low rate, they have more disposable income to purchase their own health insurance. It doesn't seem to work out in practice, though.

    I'll keep my fingers crossed that Mstr A's doctor is convinced of his need and refers you to someone who will be of best help.

    LOL: WV - kisofkd (Kiss off, kid? Kiss of kid?)


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