**** motherhood

Sometimes I really wonder why we bother having kids. Today was one of those days when I could happily have left them all by the roadside without looking back!

It started early (which probably didn't help the rest of the day) when LMB woke up for no apparent reason. As I didn't get to bed till midnight, & LMD still has a 4am feed, I wasn't overly happy to be dragged out of my slumber at 5am. It took 1/2 hour to settle her back down enough for me to go back to sleep, then mstr A woke me again at 6am when he went to the toilet! As we get up at 6.30 anyway, I wasn't in the best of moods to start with.

We got rid of my mother at 9ish, then had a photo session booked at 10am. Every year we give all the family a professional photo of the kids for Xmas, and it's always a nightmare. This year was no exception. LMB refused to wear her dress & had to be cajoled & finaly bribed to put it on. Mstr A managed to get his white Chino's dirty within 5 mins of putting them on, & LMD was in a "cuddle me" mood, which means she screams every second I am not actually holding her. The walk to the photo shoot involved me pushing the pram & carrying LMB & as she reused to walk again! Once there, Mstr A posed well for about 10 seconds, then just turned his back to the camera & refused to do anything else asked of him, LMD screamed every time I even tried to put her on the floor & LMB suddenly appeared unable to smile!

After 20 mins or so, we agreed to give up & if they hadn't got anything nice out of this session we'd try again in a couple of weeks. So I dragged all three of them home & dumped them in the car to go off to the hospital to visit Mr A. They all resolutely kept themselves awake for the whole hours drive, then as soon as I parked Mstr A jumped out of the car, accross the road & ran off in the wrong direction. I fetched him back,unpacked the girls & went on the 3 mile trek around & through the hospitals to Mr A's ward. By the time we got there, Mstr A had realised he'd left his gameboy in the car & was yelling about how unfair life is.

We spent a couple of hours with Mr A, during which time mstr A was told off for pushing the bed around three times, for shouting five times, for pulling the wires out of the computer twice & for deliberately making a mess twice. LMB was told off for shouting twice, for smearing chocolate on Mr A's newly made bed three times, for kicking LMD three times & for pushing Mstr A three times. LMD just whinged & refused to nap.

Eventually I gave up, & took them all home. LMB cried most of the way, & mstr A spent the journey alternating between criticising my driving & moaning that he felt sick. It's now 4pm, so I'm going to have to sort out their food, bath & put them all to bed before I can do anything for myself, by which time I'll be too knackered to do anything anyway!

So today, I really don't like my kids (LMB is still whinging as I type), and when I think of how today could have gone without them stressing me out, all I say is **** motherhood - it sucks.